I do not like people cancelling dates on me. I just don't. There are many reasons why people cancel on dates, some people do it in advance, some people do it one hr before they are due to meet you. While I can live with the former, it is best served with an apology, preferably by phone or in person (never email or worse, sms), and (get this in your brain) an alternative.
Without an alternative, or an apology, the message you are sending is... "Someone more important just showed up, I gotta bump you outta my life. I'm only sorry because you are my spare tyre, and you have to learn it this way."
Maybe some people can live with being second best, but I can't. I like to think that I give my friends respect, and I hope they accord me with the same treatment. My time is just as valuable as yours. If we fixed a date, it means I blocked those hours JUST FOR YOU. It means I didn't plan anything with anyone else. If you cancel on me, it means...you know what... I might just have nothing to do that day. So, you wasted my life.
I guess my pet peeve all started in 2008 when I got mass-cancelled on by 3 friends on a Sunday date meant for 5. We were supposed to go ktv. Within 2 hrs of the date, 3 cancelled citing all sorts of weird excuses -- sick, work, and get this... gotta help mother do housework. It's interesting that you realise you are violently ill just 2 hrs before our date which we planned a month ago. It's also interesting that you are exploited by your boss and you are ok with it. And it's most hilarious that you are filial to your mom when you realise that 2 out of 4 of your friends are not going to ktv with you. I was already on my way to the date, so the 4th friend agreed to meet me afterall, but she was about 1 hour late, and by then I was already fuming. On my way home I remembered it poured heavily, and I had only mt tiny blue umbrella for shelter. I thought to myself, "If I fell and got run down by a car now because I showed up for a date which didn't happen, would any of my friends that cancelled on me feel bad?" My friendship with all 3 died that year because they didn't offer the apology or alternative I was waiting for. I was disappointed but not really sad. I guess our friendship died a long time ago, which is way I was not on their priority list that rainy weekend.
Since then I've been cancelled on many other times. 2 recent examples were: 1) a friend who claimed she was busy with work, then updated her facebook to say how much she loved watching "Thor" with her husband that same day she was supposed to go out with me. I gave her a piece of my mind via her FB wall and her insincere sms explanation. 2) my brother cancelling a date with me to go out with this girl he fancied. And when it was all over, he told me "I don't even regret it." The only reason I didn't want to quarrel with him that night was because it would affect my sleep.
I try to send a strong msg on how this is really a pet peeve to me. Most people do learn from their mistake and apologise. Others are less sensitive. Those people I just cut them loose from my life. Because they are so insensitive, they probably don't know it.
The good side to this is, it has made me treasure friends who DO make time for me. Sincerity goes a long way and it can't be taught. Would I take a friend who's cancelled on me back? Perhaps, if he/she apologises in person or by phone, and what the heck, email and sms is ok depending on how much I used to like the person. Afterall, sometimes people do learn from mistakes. And I can to, from making friends with the wrong person once.
Wednesday, June 01, 2011
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Calder
http://www.cafemom.com/group/112775/forums/read/13322295/What_its_like_to_live_with_autism
看了这篇报道，不胜唏嘘。这孩子未出世前，我就知道他。他母亲与我在十多年前在一个歌曲创作人社团中认识，后来成了一片歌手的“心微”。这位大我约七岁的姐姐对我十分友善、热心。后来，创作人社团解散了，我们失联了几年。偶然地，我参加了歌曲创作比赛，这位姐姐意外地是评判。比赛后，再次联络，她帮我做了一项和音乐有关的功课。这之后不久，她便结婚了，那时邀请我但我没去。然后两年后她怀孕了，传了一通简讯给朋友们，请大家帮她想由K或C开头的男孩名字。我提议了Keagan，她没答复，我们再次失联。如今，再次得到她的消息，她成了写自闭儿童故事的作者妈妈。书中的Calder便是当年的孩子。
世事难料，好人不见得有好报。自闭儿童妈妈的背后藏着多少的心酸和坚强，也不是三言两语解释地出来。想写封email给她可是不懂要说什么才不显得虚伪、做作。从这篇文章看来，她早已平复心情，化悲愤为力量，如今利用写作才华创作一个让其他自闭儿童家长分享经验的管道。这个母亲的伟大，让我钦佩。
看了这篇报道，不胜唏嘘。这孩子未出世前，我就知道他。他母亲与我在十多年前在一个歌曲创作人社团中认识，后来成了一片歌手的“心微”。这位大我约七岁的姐姐对我十分友善、热心。后来，创作人社团解散了，我们失联了几年。偶然地，我参加了歌曲创作比赛，这位姐姐意外地是评判。比赛后，再次联络，她帮我做了一项和音乐有关的功课。这之后不久，她便结婚了，那时邀请我但我没去。然后两年后她怀孕了，传了一通简讯给朋友们，请大家帮她想由K或C开头的男孩名字。我提议了Keagan，她没答复，我们再次失联。如今，再次得到她的消息，她成了写自闭儿童故事的作者妈妈。书中的Calder便是当年的孩子。
世事难料，好人不见得有好报。自闭儿童妈妈的背后藏着多少的心酸和坚强，也不是三言两语解释地出来。想写封email给她可是不懂要说什么才不显得虚伪、做作。从这篇文章看来，她早已平复心情，化悲愤为力量，如今利用写作才华创作一个让其他自闭儿童家长分享经验的管道。这个母亲的伟大，让我钦佩。
Monday, February 28, 2011
为艺术燃烧的热情
一年一度的妆艺大游行在一片七彩烟火的炮声下，亮丽地结束了两晚两小时的圆满演出。
今年，我首次有幸带领近一百名学生参与盛会，表演一段长达20分钟的嘻哈舞蹈。台前的亮眼演出，隐藏着学生们过去六个月来所付出的新血。这包括策划、编舞、排舞、服装造型设计等，每项都是在课业以外的 时间。乘以93人的辛劳。“台上一分钟，台下十年功”，这句话绝对不假。然而，辛苦的背后，我看到了燃烧不尽的热情和迅速萌芽的革命感情。这是年轻的力量。此情此景烙印我脑海里，根深蒂固。
学生时代的我，专攻课业，没什么参加许多课外以免分心，年轻时错过了这些，课堂以外的宝贵的人生体验。如今以教育员工身份弥补曾经的遗憾，也是一种奇特的安慰。
今年，我首次有幸带领近一百名学生参与盛会，表演一段长达20分钟的嘻哈舞蹈。台前的亮眼演出，隐藏着学生们过去六个月来所付出的新血。这包括策划、编舞、排舞、服装造型设计等，每项都是在课业以外的 时间。乘以93人的辛劳。“台上一分钟，台下十年功”，这句话绝对不假。然而，辛苦的背后，我看到了燃烧不尽的热情和迅速萌芽的革命感情。这是年轻的力量。此情此景烙印我脑海里，根深蒂固。
学生时代的我，专攻课业，没什么参加许多课外以免分心，年轻时错过了这些，课堂以外的宝贵的人生体验。如今以教育员工身份弥补曾经的遗憾，也是一种奇特的安慰。
Sunday, February 20, 2011
超級瑪麗
词：蓝小邪
有隻叫瑪麗瑪麗瑪麗的螞蟻 愛上馬路對面的查理
可惜查理查理查理是隻貓 天天在想河裡的魚
只是一條馬路的距離 可憐瑪麗走不過去
眺望著查理 縮在誰懷裡吃魚
馬路上 每一輛車 各奔東西 每一個人 匆匆走到哪裡
有沒有目的 要不要目的 就像螞蟻瑪麗
有天瑪麗瑪麗瑪麗有點急 看見查理又搬來新鄰居
名叫茉莉茉莉茉莉多好聽 都讓查理忘了吃魚
原來一條馬路的距離 有時真的走不過去
可一旦走過去 查理還美不美麗
馬路上的 日升又日落 人來又人往 瑪麗抬起頭 (才發現到處都是風景)
日升又日落 人來又人往 瑪麗偶爾抬起頭
才發現用心欣賞 到處都能看到 好風景
Hey 瑪麗 oh 瑪麗 瑪麗 oh~ Hey 瑪麗 oh 瑪麗 瑪麗 oh~
原來一條馬路的距離 有時候真的走不過去
可一旦走過去 眼中的查理還美不美麗
瑪麗瑪麗瑪麗很開心 沿著馬路繼續走下去
遇上的哈利安迪波比都有趣 也讓自己變得很有趣
其實一條馬路的距離 有時真的不用過去
再美的風景看在眼裡 也可以好好放進心裡
日升又日落 人來又人往 瑪麗偶爾抬起頭看看自己
在別人的眼裡自己 自己也許也是風景
其實一條馬路的距離 有時真的不用過去
再美的風景 總會離開眼睛
###
越是看似简单的歌词，越不简单。小故事隐藏着大道理，小人物有大梦想固然可贵，也应有面对自己有限潜能的勇气。最喜欢“偶爾抬起頭看看自己 在別人的眼裡自己 自己也許也是風景”，不要好高务远却也不要妄自菲薄，你有欣赏别人的权利，也有吸引别人的潜力，是一首励志的歌曲。
Saturday, January 01, 2011
Beauty Personified - From Good to Better!
I've never really tabulated my earnings since when I started out in 2007. I only started to keep track when the numbers started to grow in mid 2008.
My 2009 profits was about $4654. Earnings rose 46.3% to hit about $6810 in 2010!
I have many points to improve in terms of entrepreneurial skills but it's good to see my efforts pay off, and in the online biz arena, there's only 3 ways of measuring success... consumer ratings, hit rate or earnings. Since Yahoo Auctions closed, I could no longer quantify my consumer ratings, so profits would be the greatest indicator of whether I was doing things right. Hit rate on my website was a longshot secondary indicator.
As I celebrate 3 years of blogshop success, I thought it's cute to look back at some of my shrewd online biz moves, which are entirely self-taught.
1. Building a blogspot blogshop
- Some may argue that Livejournal is better, or Wordpress. But I got exposed to Blogspot earlier, so it's like getting to know Hotmail first. Whichever worked, just stick to it lor. I wouldn't have gone into Blogspot had Yahoo Auctions died suddenly, but having a Blogspot shop does help me consolidate and measure consumer loyalty, which I obtain free stats from Bravenet. With Blogspot, I don't have to live in fear that a 3rd party auctions site will fail me, and that I'd lose any of my data. Of course I've not thought of what happens if Blogspot fails me. Think I'll cry lor. I have my work experience at RP to thank for some web/html exposure which made learning Blogspot a lot easier.
2. Discounts
Singaporeans are kiam peng for discounts. That's a given fact. Sweeten any deal with savings and you have a good chance of grabbing the customer's heart. My discount package isn't awesome but it sure beats blogshops who offer nothing. I have two periods for regular discounts. There's GSS period (mid May - June, 6 weeks) and anniversary discounts (Nov, 4 weeks). It's mildly successful, though sales of pre-loved items are slow. Oh I miss the Yahoo Auction days where I'd sell a pre-loved item at least once every 2 weeks...
3. Freebies for shoppers
One of my aims of selling stuff online is clear my wardrobe of new and old stuff I no longer want. It's true that one man's trash is another's treasure. Selling/buying stuff can be considered a form of recycling too, which is certainly a good deed. :) But as mentioned, sales of pre-loved items are far in between, so I've sweetened my deals further by giving away these items as freebies for all pre-order customers. To me, it's win-win, helping me to clear my wardrobe and win goodwill from my customers, encouraging them to always return to Janice for their plus-sized wardrobe needs. :)
4. Recognising Trends
When you run a biz regularly, you start recognising trends that happen on a yearly basis and it helps you focus efforts on maximising returns. The are far more enquiries in late Dec/early Jan because of CNY. The Chinese hold onto the belief that you must wear new clothes for the festival. And so instead of 1 spree, I hold 2 in this month. I also realise that most customers come online during the night from 10pm to 1am, they also like to shop during weekends and the numbers peak from Thurs onwards till Sun. So updates should be live around these times to capture more attention.
5. Creating a Mailing List
It costs 70% to businesses to acquire a new customer than to retain an existing one. So it's important to keep close links with the hand who feeds you. When I first moved my promotions from Yahoo Auctions to Blogspot, I needed a way to tell my clients about it, and so I started to compile all their email addresses to facilitate mass mailings. Creating and maintaining a mailing list is almost cost-free. By updating them with emails on latest offerings, you are reaching out to the correct target group who is interested in your products or services. Don't wait for them to approach you. Approach them. :)
My aim for 2011 is $10,000 net profit. Will I succeed? We'll see!
My 2009 profits was about $4654. Earnings rose 46.3% to hit about $6810 in 2010!
I have many points to improve in terms of entrepreneurial skills but it's good to see my efforts pay off, and in the online biz arena, there's only 3 ways of measuring success... consumer ratings, hit rate or earnings. Since Yahoo Auctions closed, I could no longer quantify my consumer ratings, so profits would be the greatest indicator of whether I was doing things right. Hit rate on my website was a longshot secondary indicator.
As I celebrate 3 years of blogshop success, I thought it's cute to look back at some of my shrewd online biz moves, which are entirely self-taught.
1. Building a blogspot blogshop
- Some may argue that Livejournal is better, or Wordpress. But I got exposed to Blogspot earlier, so it's like getting to know Hotmail first. Whichever worked, just stick to it lor. I wouldn't have gone into Blogspot had Yahoo Auctions died suddenly, but having a Blogspot shop does help me consolidate and measure consumer loyalty, which I obtain free stats from Bravenet. With Blogspot, I don't have to live in fear that a 3rd party auctions site will fail me, and that I'd lose any of my data. Of course I've not thought of what happens if Blogspot fails me. Think I'll cry lor. I have my work experience at RP to thank for some web/html exposure which made learning Blogspot a lot easier.
2. Discounts
Singaporeans are kiam peng for discounts. That's a given fact. Sweeten any deal with savings and you have a good chance of grabbing the customer's heart. My discount package isn't awesome but it sure beats blogshops who offer nothing. I have two periods for regular discounts. There's GSS period (mid May - June, 6 weeks) and anniversary discounts (Nov, 4 weeks). It's mildly successful, though sales of pre-loved items are slow. Oh I miss the Yahoo Auction days where I'd sell a pre-loved item at least once every 2 weeks...
3. Freebies for shoppers
One of my aims of selling stuff online is clear my wardrobe of new and old stuff I no longer want. It's true that one man's trash is another's treasure. Selling/buying stuff can be considered a form of recycling too, which is certainly a good deed. :) But as mentioned, sales of pre-loved items are far in between, so I've sweetened my deals further by giving away these items as freebies for all pre-order customers. To me, it's win-win, helping me to clear my wardrobe and win goodwill from my customers, encouraging them to always return to Janice for their plus-sized wardrobe needs. :)
4. Recognising Trends
When you run a biz regularly, you start recognising trends that happen on a yearly basis and it helps you focus efforts on maximising returns. The are far more enquiries in late Dec/early Jan because of CNY. The Chinese hold onto the belief that you must wear new clothes for the festival. And so instead of 1 spree, I hold 2 in this month. I also realise that most customers come online during the night from 10pm to 1am, they also like to shop during weekends and the numbers peak from Thurs onwards till Sun. So updates should be live around these times to capture more attention.
5. Creating a Mailing List
It costs 70% to businesses to acquire a new customer than to retain an existing one. So it's important to keep close links with the hand who feeds you. When I first moved my promotions from Yahoo Auctions to Blogspot, I needed a way to tell my clients about it, and so I started to compile all their email addresses to facilitate mass mailings. Creating and maintaining a mailing list is almost cost-free. By updating them with emails on latest offerings, you are reaching out to the correct target group who is interested in your products or services. Don't wait for them to approach you. Approach them. :)
My aim for 2011 is $10,000 net profit. Will I succeed? We'll see!
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